I have this image in my mind of a padded room with wifi and a power source. Blah.

It’s been a while since I’ve blogged so I guess this is a good start.

No One Else now takes its place in my mind as the absolute totally most gruelling, taxing and stressful production to date.

After No One Else, because of my multitask role, I felt totally drained, and my spirits low. This is the side of me that most don’t see, in contrast to the on-the-job me that everyone knows.

I was just really tired and I asked God,

“Why do I not feel satisfied or happy even after knowing the impact of the concert and album in terms of mission funds, and salvations? Why do I feel underappreciated even after all I’ve done?”

Today, on the bus, I got my answer in a conversation with God. I found myself asking again, why I serve and why I don’t feel joy in serving.

God’s reply was plainly and simply this:

“I can send all the thankyous and appreciation you want, but at the end of the day, you’d still feel like something’s missing.”

I wondered what this meant, and while I was still wondering, God elaborated,

“True joy comes from knowing what impact your service has to my kingdom.”

Then it dawned upon me. It’s not about earthly achievements, awards, money raised, or packing a full house for a concert. It’s about knowing that what I do glorifies God. That’s what counts.

When we lead worship, knowing that God is pleased with our worship, and with the worship offered by the people we are leading, is what brings worship leaders joy.

When we do a video, knowing that God is pleased when that video portrays excellence and creativity that was first gifted to us by Him, is what brings us media people joy.

Today, as you serve, do you know how you make God smile? When you do, you will realise what it means to find joy in serving.

Servanthood is a countercultural notion.
- Rory Noland (taken from The Heart Of The Artist)

Today in service, we sang a song by Paul Baloche, titled Offering

The lyrics are pretty simple and pretty meaningful. Have a look at them:

Offering – Paul Baloche

The sun cannot compare to the glory of Your love
There is no shadow in Your Presence
No mortal man would dare to stand before Your throne
Before the Holy One of heaven
It’s only by Your Blood and it’s only through you mercy
Lord I come

I bring an offering of worship to my King
No one on earth deserves the praises that I sing
Jesus may You receive the honor that You’re due
O Lord I bring an offering to You
I bring an offering to You

What is an offering? An offering should be something that costs. You offer services for a fee, but in the course of executing those services, it costs you because you become tired. You offer a product for a fee, but it first costs you a certain amount to purchase the product. The widow in the Bible, with just two copper coins, gave her offering. It didn’t just cost her something; it was all the finances she had, yet she gave it up for the expansion of God’s kingdom.

God offered us salvation, but it cost Him something, and that something was having to send His Son, Jesus Christ, to earth, to bear our sins and die on the cross to take our place, and redeem us from certain death and eternal suffering after.

Today, when you sing “I’ll bring an offering”, what do you mean by that? Was singing it easy, or did it cost you something? Does it cause you to think whether you worship, your singing, your raising of hands, your lifestyle, your work, your studies, your ministry, is giving up something in order to live to be more like Christ?

I’m doing my QT now and this song came upon me. My QT today touched on how God created each and every one of the stars that we see in the sky, and He knows each one by name.

God is an intricate, detailed God, yet He is a God that cares so much and so intricately for each of us; He even knows the number of hairs on our heads. In life, every single millisecond, He knows and has a plan for us. Plans to prosper us and not to harm us. Plans to make us more like Christ. There is no need to worry, in life and even in death, because Christ has given us the victory.

I’m not very sure what the title was but the pre-chorus and chorus just blew me away. It’s a pretty old song but the lyrics totally hit the spot. Here it is:

Now I come here before You
With my hands lifted up
And my heart humbly bowed
At Your work on the Cross
As You hung there and died
You were paying the price for my life
For my life

For Your love
Is higher than the heavens
Deeper than the seas
All I want is You in my life
No one else can satisfy my soul
And make me feel this way
Only You, Lord
Only You

I was just sorting through old photos that were somehow (mysteriously) left on my Mac, taking up hard disk space. It felt so good to reclaim 8GB of hard disk space that, until now, had been taken up by old photos that I didn’t even know were there. I put some of these into their rightful backup locations, while others, that I didn’t think needed to be processed or published, but were worth keeping, I put into a folder that I titled ‘Deep Freeze’.

Some of these old photos brought back really good memories. Memories of times when we rolled on the floor laughing, or that little photo, that little memory, meant a smile for someone…

Then there are some that just bring so much pain to you. The pain of bad memories, strange moments, chances never taken, choices wrongly made. Things that haunt me…regrets.

I wish I could put these in deep freeze and forget about them, but I just can’t.

But what’s the purpose in saying I wana change
What I can’t change
‘Cause it’s too late

Remember?

Here are some random thoughts and quotes I’ve gotten while playing mousehunt and while talking to people playing mousehunt.

Me: “Download the MH toolbar luh. Got free 3 Superbrie+ per day”
Person: “Huh? Really ah, so good?”
Me: “Yeah, all you gotta do is do searches. 9 searches gives you 3 free Superbrie+”
Person: “Eee, so cheat. Don’t want. I’ll stick to good ol’ cheddar”

Me: “I’ve been having a dry spell ):”
Elliot: “Haha, I had a fab day”
Me: “I think my luck is inversely proportionate to yours”
Elliot: “YA YA! So you should have more bad days.”

Here’s a spoof of a commercial we sometimes see…

“I know what I’m doing…I can feel it…my luck is changing…I caught a white mouse today. Just one try, I promise, I will give all the cheese back…just one try.”

Airport Antidote.

It’s kinda sad to let this go, but I’m selling my Think Tank Airport Antidote photo backpack as it’s been seeing too little use. It’s a great backpack though, and I’ve had no regrets buying it, all the times that I’ve used it. Very roomy and well-padded, not to mention well put together.

If you’re interested, please do contact me. (:

The scars of my past run deep. They haunt me.

I simply cannot stand the inconsiderate act of someone blasting music from their phone at full volume on a public bus.

I’m sitting in front of one such person, on the back of a night where I only slept two hours. It’s driving me nuts. I so wana grab her phone and toss it somewhere far.

So fotologue is down ):

I hope it comes back soon. It’s a great (free) way to host your higher res portfolio images.